The "E fit Be Series": Beware of Cooperate Ash...

They are everywhere in Naija, the Ash… I mean. They are easily noticed by their hair, claw like fake nails, long unnatural eyelashes, excess make up, always overly dressed and scantily clad, infact these are their trademarks. 

Here we see the "local" ones, that still stand on the roads in the evenings/night, their boobs showing and as if they rubbed groundnut oil on it to attract men. (me too I didn't know it still happened), some have strategic places they stand at to avoid task force and if they get caught, they end up shagging their way out of the situation.

The "E fit be Series": "He fit be driver"

If there's one thing Abuja is known for, its the cars. if you don't have one, you never start and if you have and its not on point, biko just join those that don't have because the G wagons and the Range rovers (not to mention the Bugatti, Bentley and Ferrari owners) are about to intimidate you on the road especially if its a picanto.

You need to see some garages to believe the kind of cars that are in Abj. Girls want to be stopped by these big car owners, some will even open leg for free because of your car.

Can you Pay my Rent?

Everyone here knows how accommodation can be, even the cheap ones aint cheap for just anyone. cheapest you can see is 200k (minus agency fee) and e fit or e fit no get toilet n kitchen o and that's if you want to be close to town small. After paying one hefty amount for a house u gats buy stuff or move and it aint cheap either. Some decide to squat sef and that one is gist for another day.

I'm THE BANK manager!

Working in a bank is some peoples dream (idk why) and dating a banker is even better for others.  Here, the skies are blue and the cars are fast but my dear if he says he’s "the bank manager" he's not lying, but ask him which bank? Because e fit be the night club "the bank" (which is not bad either) and not the zenith or gtb u know.
If she says I work in a bank, bros e fit be say she be worker for the club too so be sure to ask and confirm which, so u don't get things twisted.
If you've been here a long time and are familiar with the clubs, please what’s the best one in this town and why? Reasonable comments abeg.

No be only Single, Na Album!!

We all want that special someone, that person made for us that will just take our breathe away and complete us. It's not easy finding the one but we try our best anyways.
If you were single before you came into Abuja, have you found the one yet? or have you joined the countless people looking?
The honest truth is to find that perfect somebody might be possible in other places but in Abuja, it is impossicant (naija way of saying e no fit happen). Here bae's are almost like air, "we know say e dey there but we no dey see am". The women are looking for ATM(All The Money- from men), the men are chasing money through different ways and looking to be able to afford that G wagon and service apartment in Maitama for bragging rights, so as you can see no one has time for commitment.

"First of all Intro"

Do you sometimes wish there was a guide or handbook to living in the big city? Life in the society is hard as it is so here’s something to make it a little easier for you.

Growing up in Lagos, life as I knew it was different yet the same. The hustle and bustle, even the mad traffic although annoying and sweaty was all part of the Lasgidi life and it made things interesting.  Abuja is the entire opposite of Lagos being that when someone says “I stay in Abuja”, we imagine lots of money and luxury living. The laid back lifestyle, the good roads, mansions, the politicians, senators, ministers and “rich” people are the reason we want to be a part of the cycle and so some of us move to Abuja and that’s what I did. 

In my years here, I can say that Abuja is one of the best places to live in Nigeria (Lagos people will argue) because it’s chilled and less stressful if you're capable. Since I got here I've seen and heard a lot. Abuja is blessed with the Good, the Bad, the Ugly and the Rich of course, living here has its ups and downs especially  because here everything is done differently as compared to other states, so you gats get Abuja sense if you don’t want to be a victim of society. So brace yourself for unlimited Amebo. Welcome to the Abuja Life.